Solutions

So, having spent the weekend traveling, I've come across what I think might be a solution to any problems in airports.

Spanking! (Who would have guessed, right?) Think about it. For every item you have in your carry-on that shouldn't go through security, ten smacks to the ass with your feet on those little foot outlines where they usually wand people might discourage you from doing it again. And every minute you hold somebody up boarding because of your monstrosity of a bag, the flight attendant gets to strap you with the example seatbelt they use for the safety demonstration.

Then the only problems you have are the people who like spanking....